where we write it

can’t mange this

even if I tried to organize what I should do for today, it just won’t happen.

I love to relax and live in peace, sleep when I need to, and eat when I need to.  it’s really ugly when you feel hungry and in need to eat, but have nothing to feed yourself. Also, when you feel asleep and in need to rest, but you are not given the time to sleep, and should some work instate.   I hate to say you have to give up one for the other sometimes.  I hate to know there’s only one option to be in this world.

Now, I have to do a lot of work. I can’t breathe everytime I think about it… wonder what really matters in this life.   I love to do many things that other people think it’s useless, so I can’t do what I like. Furthermore, I hate what I do,  maybe have to do.  I kept saying there’re people who like what they do; if you don’t like what you do, then you should stop and change, because you don’t have to do it.  Now, in my case, I keep thinking I have to do it, so I don’t have the reason to quite.

If I had a son in the future, I’d want him to be what I couldn’t be,  would that be selfish?  even if it was the right thing to be, because I’m using my mind and got to that decision.  your son has his own mind, a different one.

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