where we write it

Since I Got a Twitter (+video)

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I’ll talk about three personal things:

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1- since I got on Lexapro, my new twitter (@nasvn )  has been more active.  So  @na9or  has not been writing my mind and emotions in this blog.

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2- @na9or  vs @nasvn …  Schizophrenic? what’s the deal?

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3- I still have the same feelings inside, still lonely, and I’m still perceived negatively from others but the difference is in what I focus on and how I perceive myself.

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1-  since I got on lexapro, I opened a new twitter (@nasvn ) and I have not been writing my mind and emotions in this blog:

@nasvn is a happy-go-lucky twitter that I opened, positive, hate free, love myself, my look, sexually liberated, talk as  stupid and childish as I want,  and more open to anything I want without worrying a bit in how I’m perceived.

All the pictures there I post are recent,  it’s all basically a new bright me.

Lexapro on the other hand,  helped me go to sleep and able to think about nothing.  That’s the one and best of its use,  which also allow me to have less nightmares, and wake up not crying :)  …  yet, weight gain and less athletic ? yeah,, kinda

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 2- @na9or  vs @nasvn …  Schizophrenic? what’s the deal?

Before even commenting about two personalities,  I actually ended up with more than 10 in my life time;  You should check a blog I made :  (Who The F**k Am I? ) Morelike (Who gives a f**k) .  Anyway, as some have passed (ones found in another blog (   Old-Mid-New Me  Also   In Response to old me ).      

I can’t make you not think that I’m not what you think, depressive maniac, schizophrenic emo loner… whatever.

Like i said you might see it otherwise, and you might be right. Your world!  Your reality!~ Shove it ~nn

The reason I separated the two and made @na9or  hidden is to to be cautious of some reasons (e.g. misunderstood to be emo, freakky, suicidal , creepy ..etc)

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3- I still have the same feelings inside, still lonely, and I’m still perceived negatively from others but the difference is in what I focus on and how I perceive myself:

It hurts when you get ignored;  It hurts when you’re not liked, loved, or desired;

However, –  If the cup is half empty,  then I’ll be looking at the full half.

So I learned since it’s happening anyway, it’s up to me weather to break on it,  or smile and roll to focus on something else  : )  – looking at the full half. – well,

I mean,  put yourself in my shoes,  life’s been effin bad, you can read it @na9or updates.

It’s an enforced solitary confinement;   I’m not literally in one, but I am.

Analogy is:  One man suffering of hunger because he’s in a desolated harsh-poor conditions and has no access to food,   With another man who also suffers from hunger but  because he does not eat  -( Nota bene:  he doesn’t know if it’s sickness of his body rejecting food, or his will to take food is in the right form : i.e. not necessarily can’t, and not necessarily doesn’t want to )-  So the end result is that they both have the same pain even though it’s not an option for first one to be anything else,  -( Nota bene:  Not dealing with options is Not necessarily a bad thing:  as it may just cause anxiety status when options are there not taken or unreachable )- .  I just learned the word NotaBene so Im kina shovin it against you here sorry jajajaja.

On more serious note, this last paragraph is explained better in this video above that I made awhile ago:

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Still the same,    I’ll hug myself if I didn’t receive love from no one,,   because I’m lonely


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2 responses

  1. You cannot live by reverse psychology;
    since there’s no truth to it; no one will or can know if it were happening for real; defined reasons to be valid or not?
    Accordingly, a piece of mind is the ultimate prize to seek… then
    shouldn’t it have the priority to define reasons for other concepts that weight in your life?

    December 7, 2011 at 04:27

  2. In every other parallel universe, I knew it happened.
    Why not now, anytime sure. Whatever puts money in your mouth.

    June 5, 2015 at 22:17

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