where we write it

How badly I want love


Ever since I was a kid I wanted to love, I wanted to love

Now I don’t like my voice, I grew old , lonely and old

Worn out but still I wanna love, I wanna love.. no

Can’t listen to my inner thoughts. They just hurt, they’re cold

I’ve written my book. One day we will live no more

If I don’t need, I wont want, no I don’t want

In a world of so many, but few who care, and fewer who share

An author who’s gone tomorrow

with untold incommunicable pain

Indigestible depression, sadness for lunch and dinner

Life passing by, like torture

happiness… we may never meet in life












I may never know that high

…… To hell with all of them

I’m on blocked communication. Can’t access emotions

All I want is to breath out love

Nights spent pillowtalking myself

Poetry to my other no one else

Wondering out too many endless Dejavus

Can’t escape, neither remember falling in.

Same blackhole. Frozen time

Everlasting existence. No horizon on sight

can’t believe I’m still alive, and not insane

not asleep either; just a brain

Vividly awake, violently bored

I can’t occupy it with thing

can’t laugh, can’t cry. I only dream disgusting nightmares

I already told you it’s Dejavu

It wont go away. I want to pay attention to this fire

A moment away from the deafening noises

to know if my heart still beats

Louder than my thoughts; it wants to live

Relax my stiffened lips,

to notice if my cheeks still smile; hoping they love

I want nothing else

but to breath romance instead of mess

 Wanna feel for once, Wanna forget I exist. 

Can I understand a human

Wanna know how badly I want to love

Wanna know what the heck it means

how it feels… to go

out of a blackhole, to love a universe


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