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pain and loneliness

i cant see it all

i dont have someone to tell it all

there exist those empty spots

should i stare at them to  see the pain,

tell someone about them  to feel the pain

or live incomplete, im used to lying

you hear me? that’s my voice,

look at my pictures living happy,

look at the joy in my heart, look at me smile.

i cant  cry when I speak,

im  silenced when I cry

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lonely christmas…lonely everything

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lonely christmas, lonely everything, my f-ing heart is broken for no reason. emptiness, so I feel nothing. nothing, that’s why i’m alone as sh**. I bite my own lips, stopping myself from crying.. wtf am i going thru.
i tried to reach all my “friends,” but none was available
i feel like I wanna make a video, i’d cry begging for friendsht.. i know i’d be a joke. but i’m depressed, sad and lonely all the time

so I’m not going home?

I wanna go home,

I wanna sit in an air plane 19 hours to get home.

I will wait in airports, I’m cool with delays. Read the rest of this page »

no idea

sometimes you just gotta cry… to let it out.  I don’t know what it is that you let out. but this shit is how, some of us humans come out of some battles alive after being beaten up.  struggling and shit. never made it.  dreams are too far. too too far. too freaking far. seem impossible. I’m just not meant to be there. not meant to be that dude who I always thought I could be. Read the rest of this page »

wanna explode and cry to … fate?

stuff aren’t going my way at all

I don’t know why I don’t want to do what I’m supposed to do…  do projects and homework.  I missed 5% of my thermo class last Monday when I missed all the due shit that was for that day

I didn’t finish the thermo project yet,   and still have the kinematics project that I kind of have no idea about it at all ~

I keep doing everything to “avoid” starting my work… ADD? Read the rest of this page »

..failin college& stress

i’ll write what’s happening to me coldly ( no emos)

– thermo2334- 4credit was doing just C before this

just got out of an exam this morning, Read the rest of this page »

poor cheap f**king love

cheap poor love

cheap poor fking love

cheap poor fking love

cheap poor fking lov Read the rest of this page »

Yesterday&Today&Tomorrow&After Tomorrow | continous stress, but we go thru| missed another 3% of my 4-credit class

yesterday: was doing hw from 10 pm till 6 am, slept 30 mins, went to school, class 730am class 830-10:30 am then ate then class 12-1:30 pm, went back, slept 2 hrs, then went soccer, walking to the field from 6pm, as there was a game starting 7:30 pm. I was so excited Read the rest of this page »

busy life pace, it’s changing me

I don’t b!tch about how lonely or depressed I am these days as much as I used to.  SImpley because, I don’t have the time to do so. In fact, I’m looking for the time to do that, and I can’t Read the rest of this page »

Is this love that I am feeling

I like them so much.
Their voices are stuck in my head.
They can tell me anything and I will do it.
They can do nothing I hate;
I become obsessed with everything they do.
I find them perfect whether I use my logic or heart.
Forever and ever I can be their slave if no one freed me. Read the rest of this page »